There is a feeling that comes to me in the fall when the light is shining through the window just so, kind of sideways in the morning after all the kids are off to school. There must be a window where I can see the rest of the world, busy about their work. And there must be classical music creating a little bubble of peace.
Classical music to me is not sitting in a stuffy hall in your uncomfortable church clothes watching a bunch of musicians in their uncomfortable church clothes play music that everyone pretends to like. To me classical music is anesthesia for a job that I don’t enjoy very much. Sometimes I listen to classical music and I am in a concert hall, watching musicians play, but most of the time, the music is just the soundtrack to my imagination.
It works without a window too. I used to listen classical music seriously when I had a job cutting grass. It became a great escape for me. I had these radio headphones that allowed the music to take me far away from the tedious and laborious tasks of weed-eating. And when I finally got a job in the air conditioning, I would listen to classical music from the comfort of my desk as I watched the hustle and bustle of traffic just outside my window. That is the feeling that I am trying so hard to describe to you. It is as if I am looking at the rest of the world in a little glass terrarium, the music allows me to be an outside observer.
I was introduced to classical music when Mom bought our first CD player and a few CDs. The one I remember was a collection of classical music favorites. I listened to that album a lot in my bedroom. And if I hear one of those pieces today, like Schubert’s unfinished symphony, I am transported back to my little bedroom with my octagonal window.
Maybe it was because of the record player that listening to music became a ritual for me. I needed help from an adult with the record player. And once the record started, I would be left alone to be tended by the music. I just had to listen to the whole thing, there was no turning back. So I think that sense of commitment carried over to CDs. Anytime I got a new CD, I would sit down and listen to the whole thing front to back without stopping. I still think this is the best way to listen to music.
For all my love for classical music, I have only ever been to one concert. It was when I was a teenager. We went to a beautiful concert hall somewhere in Birmingham to see-and hear-the Alabama Symphony Orchestra play Variations on Haydn. At the beginning of the concert, the conductor gave a speech to the audience. And for some reason, the first chair violin was chatting with his neighbor. The conductor turned around to say something to him out of the microphone. When the conductor turned back to the audience, the first chair violin shook his bow at the conductor. That has always stood out to me. Was there bad blood between these two? Jealousy? Was this simply a joke? Who can know? I remember liking the music though and just staring at the orchestra. I could’ve watched it all night. My Uncle Tony elbowed me to point out a man who had fallen asleep. I guess it would be good music for sleeping.
I have been listening to a lot of classical music lately because the weather is just asking for it. And perhaps maybe because I like to daydream.
Mostly From Memory 